My Thoughts…. What is a safe haven?   A safe haven is anyone, anything, anywhere you can find relief from the pressure, anxiety, and  fear of your abusive relationship–if only for a few minutes, or a few hours.  A safe haven would be; visiting a family member, or a friend, sitting in the park, going for a walk or run, even finding the time to read a funny joke, or a few pages in a good book.  Whatever  you think a safe haven can be for you, will be your  safe haven.  The demands on a woman’s physical and emotional health when in an abusive relationship takes a heavy toll.  Women can become susceptible to lower immune systems, depression, anxiety and many other ailments.  Finding a safe haven is imperative to realize a sense of safety and peace for even a short time.  It can help to break the cycle of chaos and violence, and give you a time to begin to think of a way out.


My safe haven was my mother’s apartment.  Once a week I would do a wellness check on her.  And  the few hours I was there became a godsend for me.  When I was at her   house I felt totally safe, relieved, at peace–like a weight was lifted, and most of all, I felt-FREE.   I often look back on those days and see how checking on my mother, was really a wellness check for me.   Going from the stress of my house, into my mother’s,  always felt like I had just stepped  into a parallel universe.  Where  birds were chirping, the sun was shining,  flowers were blooming, and I could be myself.   I could laugh, and dance,( I couldn’t do that in front of him).   I savored  those few hours each week.  And, while I was there,  I also worked on devising a plan that would eventually take me to my permanent safe haven.


As a woman who has been where you are, I know how badly you need a safe haven.  I want you to see what you can do to find your own safe haven this week.  Don’t wait!  And write to me, let me know what your safe haven is.

_____T.E. Napolez, Author

About tenapolez

I am new to blogging but not new to writing. I want my blog to have the affect people need to hear.
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